"Original Sin" by mystique-jewled (guest review by Susan)

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Isabella Swan, daughter of Baron Charlie Swan, is slowly suffocating from the expectations and pretenses of the society she was born into. When she learns that she is about to be married off to the inappropriate Lord Jacob Black, she balks and decides to run away from home. With help from her handmaid, Angela, she escapes to town and seeks shelter with Angela's family. For a while, everything seems like it will be alright. She enjoys being with the Webbers and can even imagine spending the rest of her life there with them. Yet during her stay, she stumbles upon wanted poster of a man named Edward Cullen. She discovers that he's an infamous pirate that's rumored to have killed his own father. For some reason, the picture of the man intrigues her, no matter how hard she tries to deny it. Later that night, she and the Webbers learn that guards sent by her father have come to take her back. They make a plan to disguise Bella as a boy so that she'll be safer when running away. She makes it out to the streets, but when a guard finds her and mistakes her for a pirate, Jasper Whitlock, first mate to the notorious pirate captain Edward Cullen has to save her. He sympathizes with the young woman and offers her refuge on his ship. Scared and desperate, Bella accepts.

Edward Cullen has demons of his own to deal with long before Isabella Swan arrives in his life. His past is even darker than his present and he has much reason to be as jaded as he is. False accusations and unjust charges fuel his desire for revenge. It's in this state that Bella finds him. Edward and Bella clash from the moment they meet. Bella (or Ben as she calls herself in order to keep her disguise) is annoyed at the captain and his cruel ways, and the last thing Edward wants is a weak boy on his ship. However, as time goes on and circumstances force the two closer and closer, they develop feelings for each other...feelings that scare both of them to no end. Bella knows who Edward is and how being with someone like him could ruin her life, and Edward is just scared to be feeling anything other than anger. As Edward's violent past comes back to haunt him, will his feelings for Bella heighten his resolve? Or merely crash and burn?

Mystique-jewled took me completely by surprise in this story. I'll admit that I didn't know what to expect when I first started reading it as I was simply trusting a recommendation. As I started reading it, though, I couldn't help but be drawn in by mystique-jewled's writing. She hasn't written many fanfictions yet (only this story and a one-shot), but I can tell that she's definitely an author to watch out for. Her words just flow very beautifully and all of her characters are distinct and developed. The dynamic between all of her characters is planned and executed very precisely and it left me laughing, crying, and shaking my head several times throughout the story. Also, the chemistry between Edward and Bella is simply superb. The sexual tension between the two is incredibly thick whenever they're together and it leaves you begging for more. The fact that their love is a little bit forbidden just heightens the tension that much more. Edward's character in the story is so lonely and jaded that you just have to sympathize with him. He makes a few bad decisions, but you come to understand that his character is simply flawed in that way. Bella's influence on him and the moments they share together are so sweet and passionate that I never wanted them to end. Though mystique-jewled specializes in keeping the reader on the edge of their seat through her drama-filled chapters, the fluff is just as good. The story was just recently completed and I followed it until the very last word

Original Sin consists of 24 chapters and a total of 189,195 words. The story is rated M for mature and sexual situations, and language.

COMPLETE

This story was recommended by Susan!